This is the classic matchup of the reigning champ vs. the hot newcomer, as Marisa Miller has reigned for at least the last five years as “the” hottest woman alive, posing everywhere from Victoria’s Secret to Sports Illustrated to classy artistic nude photographs (all pornography becomes “art” if it is in black and white). But an 18-Year Old named Kate Upton has taken the world by storm in the last few months, appearing all over the new SI Swimsuit issue, the internet, and television.
Her “boob outtakes” picture from a few weeks back only furthered her popularity, and now as the #1 trending topic on Google, she seems to be the “hottest girl alive” of the moment. I gotta be honest, I don’t see what all the hype is about. Obviously I agree she is in the laughably hot range, a plateau reserved for a small sect of models and actresses that are so hot that all you can do is laugh when you see pictures of them. But the #1 girl? No. Let’s even say you don’t like exotic girls (eliminates at least half of all hot girls, and Allesandra Ambrosio counts as 10), or brunettes (cya Miranda Kerr). What does Upton have that sets her apart from other blond-haired, American supermodels? For me, Marisa Miller wins this by a mile despite being twelve years older than Upton, a feat which makes her continued hotness even more impressive. Granted, Miller has had more years to inundate us with pictures and endearing appearances on late night television, so Upton could eventually overtake her, but it’s going to take a lot of work. Just don’t hand over the thrown so easily. Cast your votes below.
It’s “throne,” not “thrown.