College Skirt Day

23 Mar

As the winter months drag on, we are constantly questioning the purpose of attending the long and dreary classes our college careers require.  But we are currently approaching the most beautiful time of the year, all of which starts with skirt day.  We all know and look forward to that first warm day in spring when every smoke show on campus casually strolls into class showing off their brand new sundress or skirt they conveniently just purchased.  After countless hours of online shopping on Forever 21, it’s no wonder they planned on making their entrance five minutes after class started.  Of course, the hotter the girl, the later she walks in to ensure a better entrance.  We men all wonder about some secret weather calendar that all chicks abide by when coordinating this first day where pants are highly frowned upon; if there is an app for this I would like to know about it.  This is the day where your fellow guy classmates that frequently skip class are sure to show up.  You will find yourself praying for class to last forever as you drool over the girl in the far corner.  The professor can’t figure out why the class is suddenly so full and usually starts the lecture with a cliché joke about how he’s going to need a bigger classroom.  You’ll find any possible reason to keep yourself exposed to all the babes walking around campus whether it be pretending you have some sudden interest in throwing a frisbee around on the quad or simply walking laps around campus until the sun goes down.  Every five minutes you spot a new chick in a stunning sundress that you ultimately decide will be your weekend hookup.  Either way, you are consistently trying to capture as much of this view through your eyes without gaining that creeper status.  A typical class involves gazing into the eyes of the girl sitting next to you (who never before had your attention until this day) while texting your bro about how bizarre it is that suddenly all of these babes are popping up that you never knew existed.  Why is it that from this day until the leaves start to fall that all girls’ hotness are raised one level (7.5’s are now 8.5’s).  This phenomenon we will never understand.  It is our job to sit back, relax, appreciate this day, and snap some stealthy phone pics as the babes roll by and hope two 9.5’s wearing the same sundress come within 100 meters of each and get in an ugly catfight.

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